Project Runway--place your bets

Okay, I've waited as long as I could. It’s time for me to blog about Project Runway and, specifically, to lay money on my top three.

For me, the moment of clarity came during the “Mom and Sister” challenge when I had to ask myself who I would want working with my loved ones, and the answer was simple: Michael, who is talented and thoughtful; Laura who is elegant and meticulous; or Uli, who is gifted and considerate.

Any of the others gave me the wiggins just thinking about it.

I’m not the most fashion-forward person, but these three seem to combine artistic talent with good, old-fashioned common sense, and isn’t it about time this show turn out a winner whose clothes can be found at Nordstrom.com (because that’s where I buy a lot of my things.)

So, if it were up to me, we’d soon be saying goodbye to…

Kayne—I loved ya, babe. I really did. I love that you live in Oklahoma and aren’t afraid of being a pageant jockey. But can any of us deny that you’ve been on a slippery slope for a while and are now just barely hanging on my your rhinestone belt buckle? I laughed out loud for two solid minutes because of you last night (and not in a good way.)

Vincent—you annoying little…. Go away, Vincent. Go away! You don’t listen to Tim Gunn (unlike Michael who always brainstorms with Tim and comes out better for it); you use vulgar, disgusting analogies; and furthermore annoy me. Go away!

Jeffrey—you have been on my nerves since the get-go with all your little “My garment was the only real garment in the room” comments. Laura said it best, “If you’re so great and successful, Jeff, what are you doing here?” So true. I think the judges will keep you around until the final four, but please…oh please…show your true colors again so that they will give you the boot.

In other news, I really felt sorry for Uli last night. As Sabrina Rojas Weiss said on tvguide.com “…while Uli has consistently made beautiful, interesting clothing, much of which looks like she'd wear herself, she is criticized for making beautiful, interesting clothing that looks like something she'd wear herself for the one challenge that asked her to do so…”

Another PR pet peeve, I’m consistently amazed by how they handle the model side of the competition—allowing them to advance usually based solely on luck. It’s almost enough to make me feel sorry for models (if anyone can feel sorry for beautiful, size two amazons.)

So…my money is officially on Michael, Laura, and Uli (as long as she can change her style up a little bit next week, and I think she’s smart enough to do just that.)

Who are your picks?

Ally

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Took a break last night to watch Veronica Mars. Sigh. It was the Alterna-Prom episode. Double sigh. Logan was totally working the Rick’s Café Americana look. Tripple sigh. He opened the door with his shirt off…

Okay. I’m better now. Carrying on…

There was an article last week about adults finally discovering the joy that is YA fiction—yea!

But, of course, this prompted yet another round of genre wars (did these people learn nothing from my awesome cattle analogy?)

Why are people so quick to discount books that target young adults? Have they forgotten that many of today’s “classics” were yesterday’s YAs? Huck Finn? To Kill a Mockingbird? Catcher in the Rye?

And books that feature teens who also happen to be girls? Well, then they must be fluff!

I hope I’m wrong. I mean, I REALLY hope I’m wrong. But I’m becoming more and more convinced that sexism and ageism are very much alive when it comes to judging the quality of stories.

If To Kill a Mockingbird were released today what do you think reviewers would say? Now…imagine what they might say if Jem and Dill had been girls too?

If Joanne Rowling had written a book about Harriet Potter would she now be the richest woman in England?

A part of me hopes that these stories would still be called free-spirited, imaginative and probing. A part of me fears they would have been called silly.

It’s not exclusive to books either.

If Veronica Mars were a thirty-something man would the show be winning Emmys and garnering huge ratings?

I don’t know. What I do know is that I recently finished a very good book by a man, about a man. I laughed. I cried. It was a great read—certainly worthy of the attention it’s garnered. But the whole time I was reading I kept asking myself what the response would have been if it had been the Book of Jane and not the Book of Joe.

Would it still be a critical darling? I really, really hope so. Otherwise, I might just have to start publishing as Al Carter.

I'm not saying I'm right on this issue, but lately I've geniunely started to wonder...

--Ally

Emmy wrap-up

How much do I love awards shows?

The answer is so, so much. And since Tivo came into my life I love them even more!

A few notes from the Emmys:

Yea! Jeremy Piven won for Entourage! I've loved him since Cupid (a show that I would totally have on the Ally network--probably airing after the canceled but cute Miss Match, staring Alicia Silverstone.)

And Ari--I mean Jeremy's--speech was one of my faves of the night. But Jeremy...an ascot? Really?




My new favorite person in now Helen Mirren, who not only gave the best shout-out to writers of the night, but is now the ONLY person I can ever imagine playing Patricia Buckinham in the Gallagher Girls movie.

Sure, she's probably not as old as the Gallagher Academy's senior staff member, but in my mind Buckingham is ageless, and that white dress proved that Helen Mirren is, too!

As a female writer, trying to write great female characters, I've got one for you, Ms. Mirren!



And while we're casting movie parts, I'm also now firm in my convictions that Hugh Laurie would be absolutley fabulous as Mr. Smith. Or...well...the first Mr. Smith, since in my dream reality there are several movies, and there's a different Mr. Smith in every one since he's all about the plastic surgery.

Anyhow, Hugh Laurie--LOVE him!

In other news, can someone explain to me whether Thief was a series or a mini-series? I thought it was a series, but now it's being classified as a miniseries. Was it just canceled and "minified" for the benefit of awards show season? In any case, kudos to Andre Brauer.

The following is a note from me to Ellen Pompeo:

Ellen, you are beautiful, and thin, and talented, so sweetie why couldn't you get a dress you could walk in?

Chandra Wilson, your co-star Dr. Bailey, looked comfortable and elegant and she's kinda short and had a baby within the last year! So kudos to her. Love Dr. Bailey!

Ellen, I love what you were going for, but you looked so freaked out by the thought of walking that you couldn't even look happy on the arm of Patrick Dempsey, so I can only assume that you were having a very bad fashion night.

That's it. That's all I have to say to Ellen.


And now I've saved the best for last...



BEST DRESSED COUPLE:



Really, truly, it was honor enough just being nominated.


-Ally

ps...and yes, I have lost weight. Thank you for noticing.

AOBs and genre wars

My family is in the cattle business, and I spent my formative years showing cattle. Yes, showing. Yes, cattle. Steers to be specific. (Do I need to remind you all that I am not normal!)

Well, with the release of This is Not Chick Lit and its rebuttal This is Chick Lit the genre wars seem to be heating up again, and—amazingly—I’ve started thinking back on those early steer showing days.

Crazy, I know, but bear with me.

When people ask, “what kind of cattle do you raise?” my father usually shrugs and says, “I try to raise good ones.”

He’s not being flippant—just honest—because, you see, that’s a loaded question.

Not to bore everyone with a lessen in genetics, but hybrid vigor is a very real thing that happens when you cross-breed animals or plants--the value of the whole can become greater than the sum of the parts.

And the kind of cattle you end up with don't fall in any easy category, so they're shown as AOBs—all other breeds.

I understand the need for genres just as I understand the need for maintaining purebred genetics lines. What I don’t understand is the thinking that one genre is better than another, especially since the really great stories usually result from hopping the fence and messing up the gene pool.

Is Little Miss Sunshine a comedy? A drama? A coming of age story? A family picture? I don't know, and furthermore I don't much care.

Do I write chick lit? Maybe. But Julia James is Bridget Jones’s opposite in every way, so maybe not.

Are my books women’s fiction. Okay. But my cousin’s husband who builds barns for a living (ie… a very manly man) just loved Cheating at Solitaire and has ordered Love You Kill You on audio so that his whole barn-building crew can listen to it.

Are my books for adults or young adults? Cheating at Solitaire is the most popular book at a middle school in western Oklahoma and Love You Kill You is a fave among several retirees I know.

Is Love You Kill You a romance? An action/adventure/thriller? A coming of age story? A school drama?

Yes. Yes to all.

So when people ask me what kind of books I write, it sure would be nice to shrug and say, “I try to write good ones.”

And I do…try, I mean. What genre do I end up with? Well, I guess you’d call it All Other Books.

I just can’t get away from the AOBs.

Now I guess I’d better get back to it.


-Ally

Busy, Busy, Busy

Despite being very busy, I've managed to both watch Mona Lisa Smile on TV tonight and finish The Book of Joe by Jonathan Tropper.

Now, I've seen Mona Lisa Smile, but when I saw it coming on I got sucked in--not because I didn't know what was coming, but because it was like stepping inside so many of my mental images of the Gallagher Academy. Plus, I firmly believe that movie will be to actresses of that generation what The Outsiders was to actors of the eighties.

And what can I say about The Book of Joe except that it's the first book I've picked up in a long, long time that I didn't want to put down. Enough said. If you don't mind a little mature content and love a well-turned phrase then check it out.

Okay, the girls beckon. They're telling me the first chapter is boring and darn it if I don't think they're right!

-Ally

Snakes on a farm

I love movies--but a lot of people can say that, so I don't think it makes me special or anything. The fact that might set me apart is that I love going to the movies.

I'll see almost anything so long as the theater is clean and the Diet Coke is cold and I can escape inside someone else's imagination for ninety minutes or more.

But even then there are some movies that I will not see.

Case in point: Snakes on a Plane.

I don't care how cool Samuel L. Jackson is, I will not see this movie. In fact, I won't even look directly at any of the promotional materials for this movie because snakes give me nightmares.

You try killing a cottonmouth with a garden hoe when you're 12 and see how it affects you later in life.

Not to mention the time we came home from church to find a rattlesnake with 12 rattles and a button (ie...a big, freaking snake) spread out across my grandfather's front yard--having been killed in our hay meadow.

Or there was the time my mom found a snake in the canned goods cabinet. Sure, it was a harmless black snake, but it was in the kitchen cabinets for crying out loud! (We think it slithered in through the back door in search of someplace cool and dark--and it found it--right behind the home-canned pickles.)

And one time one of our dogs caught a big rattlesnake under our stock trailer and held it in his mouth, whipping it through the air like a rope, banging its head against the ground, until it died.

Or there was the time my dad was on the tractor and yelled for me to go get his gun (Yes, if you grow up on a farm, dads really do call for their daughters to go get their guns from time to time.) So, I got the gun, brought it to him, and he shot two cottonmouths--one of which was kinda plump--and then we cut it open and found it was full of dozens of baby cottonmouths.

So no. No thank you on the snake movie.

Once you've lived the live-action version of Snakes on a Farm, snakes on a plane really doesn't sound like a good way to spend an afternoon.


--Ally


ps...there was a time during my senior year at OSU (after I'd been accepted to Cornell) where I had seen every single movie playing in Stillwater, Oklahoma. Except, of course, Anaconda.

Most wonderful time of the year (2006 edition)

Yes. That's right. It's the most wonderful time of the year again--time for the new fall TV lineup!

A new Prison Break episode last night only fed the beast that is my need for good TV, so imagine how thrilled I was to find that TV Guide has their new grid up to show all my primetime viewing options.

Have I printed it out and planned what I will watch, Tivo, and record on the backup VCR?

What do you think?

Oh happy day.



Deadlines call!

Ally

All about TV

There’s a line in the first chapter of Learning to Play Gin that says, “Lance felt like he was seeing New York City from the wrong side of five a.m.”

Well, that was me this morning. Except I was seeing the wrong side of Joplin. But at four-thirty in the morning does it really matter?

Nevertheless, it was great fun meeting everyone at Good Morning Four States this morning! Big thanks to Gina and Ronny for picking up Love You Kill You and getting in touch!

Also, as if my day wasn’t TVrific enough, I just remembered that PRISON BREAK IS BACK TONIGHT!!!

Oh yeah. That’s right. The boys are on the loose, and I for one am absolutely giddy about it.

So, in short, kiddies. TV is good.

Except when you have a sequel to finish…

-Ally

Book Club Pick!

For those of you who live in the Joplin, Missouri area, get up early (or set your TV recording device of choice), because I'm going to be on the Joplin ABC affiliate, KODE-12, Monday morning!

That's right, I'D TELL YOU I LOVE YOU BUT THEN I'D HAVE TO KILL YOU is the KODE book club pick for August!

Many thanks to Gina Beck for randomly picking up the book, loving it, and then getting in touch.

-Happy Reading, Four States!

Ally

They so should take away my "chick lit" card...

Random Reader Quote of the Day

I ADORE ur book "I'd tell you I love you but then I'd have to kill you" it ROX MY SOX...and I'm not wearing sox!!
by Kay, posted on MySpace

No real time tonight for a proper blog, so how about an improper one (cue stupid/cheesy/stand-up-comedian at the airport Holiday Inn ka-ching-ching drum sound to tell you that was supposed to be funny.)

What follows is something that will either A) get me kicked out of the chick lit writers of the world or B) show that the chick lit stereotype is way off-base shoe-wise. You make the call:

As I've said here before my black casual sandals are falling apart. No way will they make it through another summer. Heck, they may not make it through what's left of this summer, so in the ten spare minutes I had today I dashed into the Dillard's shoe department, circled the floor grabbing every black sandal, went to the poor college kid working and said, "I need these in a seven and half or an eight."

To his credit, the kid just said, "All of these?"

To which I replied, "All of these."

Ten minutes later he's still in the back trying to round them up. Another sales girl comes by and says, "He's looking for the last pair."

I said, "I promise I'm going to buy a pair. I swear! See."

Picture me showing her my current shoes.

Two minutes later I heard her in the back, "Oh yeah," she said, "she has to buy a pair!"

So then he comes out looking much like I imagined Lance looking in the toy store scene in Cheating at Solitiare where he can't see over the boxes. Yeah. That was my sales guy.

I tried on the shoes. I hated all the shoes.

I pointed to a shoe on the display rack and asked, "Did you not have that in a seven and a half or eight."

The poor kid sighed. "That's the shoe you didn't get."

Me: "Oh."

Him: "Do you want to try that?"

Me: "Yes. And if it fits I'll buy it."

It did. So I did. So that's today's boring blog.

I bought new shoes and made a college kid want to cry. My life is so full.

Now, back to the Gallagher Girls.


-Ally


ps...in othe news, bookseller chick is raving about my buddy Jennifer Lynn Barnes and Golden. Go check it out.

Evolution

I met one of my idols last Saturday. I won’t say who exactly because she is a very famous writer who has chosen to live a very private life (and no, it’s not Harper Lee-but you’re thinking along the right track).

During our very brief conversation I mentioned how difficult it can be to evolve as a writer and yet continue to turn out the types of books your readers expect.

Her answer: forget them. Just write the book you want to write and forget about anyone and everyone else.

Wow.

I know some people may think that's easy to say once you’re a household name. But maybe that’s the way you become a household name.

It’s no secret that I really struggled when writing Learning to Play Gin, the soon-to-be released sequel to Cheating at Solitaire. I kept trying to recreate Solitaire, to give the reader the same voice, the same tone, the same reading experience.

But I finally reached a point last fall where I realized that Julia was a different person at the start of Gin than she was at the start of Solitaire. I tossed aside everything I thought the book needed to be and returned, as I like to say, to the center of the story.

The risk this takes is that people who loved Solitaire will hate Gin and vice versa. From a marketing standpoint it may be a nightmare, but it’s what the book HAD to be, and after reading it this weekend I felt satisfied that I had indeed found the center of the story.

And that’s all a writer can hope to do.

As I work on the second of what I hope to be several Gallagher Girls stories, this point is even more real to me.

The girls are growing up, getting better at their craft, and the stakes are getting higher. For a few weeks I’m going to turn off my mind, my phone, and maybe even my email and listen to nothing but their voices.

And as much as I want to write a sequel that fans will love I know that doesn’t happen by listening to the fans, but rather by listening to the characters.

My little girls are growing up.

Now I've got to let them.

-Ally

ps...has anyone heard the new Dixie Chicks CD? Talk about evolving as artists. Love them!

Highs and lows

Random Reader Quote of the Day

"I'd Tell You, etc., is the only book to ever make me almost miss a flight for which I arrived at the airport 2 hours early. I was browsing in the airport bookstore, picked up you book, and two hours later was running for my plane because I was so engrossed that I missed all the boarding calls."
by Brooke

I know life if full of highs and lows, and I'm starting to think that, for writers, the highs go a little higher and the lows a little lower.

For example, Saturday brought me a standing-room-only crowd full of friends, family, idols, and complete strangers who just happened to have read and loved my book. Gotta love Saturday.

But then there was Monday. Why does every Saturday have to come with a Monday? Why?

Even Monday had its highs and lows.

Reading Learning to Play Gin for the final time before seding the FINAL version back to my editor--high.

Knowing that I will never again be able to fix something I may not like about it--low.

Allowing myself one hour of TV time to watch The Closer--high.

Hearing that there are only three new episodes left--low.

Finding out that Dell is going to send me a new laptop battery--high.

Realizing that my old laptop battery could cause my computer to spontaneously combust--low.

Picking up Love You Kill You and thinking, "Wow! This is better than I remember!"--high.

Knowing I just have to make the sequel that much better--low.

Getting reminded that my agent and editors are all about helping me make it the best book possible--high.



So now I've got to get back to work!
Ally

Literary Lunch

Random Reader Quote of the Day

"I LOVE I'd tell you I loved you, but then I'd have to kill you. It is by far the best book I have ever read."
By Jessica

E. Lockhart and John Green are blogging about their literary crushes, so of course I thought that would be cool. I even wrote the following:

--Dennis Lehane is my literary crush to end all literary crushes. True, his books are nothing like mine, but opposites do attract. And can you imagine what you’d get if you crossed Mystic River or A Drink Before the War with Love You Kill You? Well…I can’t imagine it either, but it’d probably ROCK!

But Dennis Lehane was as far as I got. Really. Truly. Why go any further?

So then I decided to modify this cool idea and decide which writers I would love to have over for supper.

But literary supper just doesn’t have a very good ring to it. So I’m making it Literary Lunch because I’m all about alliteration.

So, you are cordially invited to a literary lunch at the home of Ally Carter.

This is who’s coming:

Sarah Dessen who simply must come because she’s lovely and talented and I can imagine us hanging out in the kitchen and her volunteering to put ice in the glasses while we talk about Veronica Mars.

Jennifer Crusie and Bob Mayer because they seem like the literary Bonnie and Clyde. Or Lucy and Ethel. In any case I want them there because what dinner party is complete without a bickering couple?

Jennifer Weiner because I think she’d be a hoot.

Tim Gunn because I don’t know a single writer who isn’t obsessed with him and doesn’t want him to help us with our unfinished books just like he helps the Project Runway designers with their unfinished garments.

Jonathan Tropper about whom I know very, very little except that everything he breathes on gets optioned by big-time Hollywood people and I want him breathing on me and my lasagna.

(Did I mention we’ll be having lasagna?)

Maggie Marr whom I actually know and who is very cool and incredibly talented and with whom I will someday win an Emmy (which is why Jonathan Tropper will be breathing on us both).

And finally JK Rowling who I think will probably volunteer to toss the salad while Sarah Dessen does the glasses and pours the tea. I know she’s the biggest literary star in the universe, but she still strikes me as a “let me help you with that salad” sort of lady which is just one more reason to love her. (And then I will eat ALL the salad trying to digest as much JK Rowlingness as possible.)

So that’s it. My literary lunch.

Sarah, JK and I are busy in the kitchen. Jenny Crusie just came in to borrow a knife a few minutes ago and now she’s chasing Bob Mayer around the yard with it yelling, “you call yourself a Green Beret!”

Jonathan Tropper is in the bathroom. Hiding from me.

Maggie Marr and Jennifer Weiner are sitting at the bar swapping Shirley McClain stories.

And Tim Gunn just looked in the oven and told me, “Make it work.”

-Ally

Big Day

Random Reader Quote of the Day

"I absolutely loved your book!!!!!
I read it in two days cause i just couldnt put it down!!!
But now im ready for the sequel!!!!"

by Abby, posted on MySpace

Well, I don’t know about you but I had a very big day today.

6:00 a.m. Niece #1 appears in doorway of guest bedroom and announces, “Aunt Ally getting up?”

6:02 a.m. Aunt Ally goes back to bed.

8:25 a.m. Mom calls on cell phone with latest list of family members who are coming to pre-signing pizza celebration and book signing.

8:26 Calculate new total of family members coming to pizza celebration and book signing.

8:27 a.m. Freak out slightly and call Hideaway Pizza to tell them to have plenty of fried mushrooms.

9:00 a.m. Watch niece #2 sleeping peacefully and wonder if she ever cries.

9:05 a.m. Get answer to the crying question.

10:00 a.m. Feed niece #2 bottle while Sister goes to get haircut.

10:35 a.m. Realize that Niece #2 has developed raging case of hiccups.

10:36 a.m. Convince self that hiccups are, in fact, lethal to newborns and I will soon owe sister a new baby.

10:40 a.m. Hiccups fade and normalcy resumes.

10:00 a.m. Family begins arriving, hand off newborn to someone who will not submit her to death-via-hiccups.

11:30 a.m. Depart for Hideaway Pizza where family and friends are gathering for pre-signing pizza bash.

12:10 p.m. Gorge self on fried mushrooms, leaving little-to-no room for pizza.

1:45 p.m. Arrive at Barnes and Noble with black sharpie, fresh lipstick, and a box full of promotional Frisbees courtesy of the good people at Hyperion.

1:47 p.m. Greet wonderful, courteous booksellers and explain Frisbee situation.

1:52 p.m. See signing area where people are already waiting!

1:53 p.m. Say hello to Jen Barnes who is just as lovely as ever and who does not in any way prompt a jealousy-blackout (and who would probably take me should the aforementioned blackout occur.)

2:00 p.m. Speak to wonderful, standing-room-only crowd of booklovers and family members. (And book-loving family members.)

2:30 p.m. Sign and sell every book they have in the store but, sadly, forget to give Frisbees to most people who bought books.

3:10 p.m. Insist on sneaking Niece #1 sips of a very yummy, very sugary strawberry smoothie type concoction before sending her home with Sister.

3:45 p.m. Say goodbyes and drive home.

So that’s it—my big day. Or most of it.

I don’t want to bore you with exactly who was there—but there were some very cool people there—and I’m very grateful.

I’m also very, very glad I got to do this event with Jen Barnes (buy her book!) and I hope this won’t be the last!

By the way, don’t worry if I’m MIA a lot this week. The Gallagher Girls are in the midst of a very big op and they need a lot of my time.

Later, and thanks again for all of you who came today (or wanted to).

-Ally

Reasons you should come to our signing

Random Reader Quote of the Day:

"Please tell me you are like making 45478785655 sequals to the Gallagher Girls Academy i will love you forever."

by Ash, posted on MySpace

Warning: this post contains sarcasm. If you don't understand or appreciate sarcasm read at your own risk!

I'm thrilled to report that Gallagher Girls 2 has now passed the Truly Hideous Draft (THD) phase and is approaching Slightly Resembles a Book (SRB) form. Whoo hoo!

Also, remember that I'll be signing and speaking at the Barnes and Noble on 41st Street in Tulsa tomorrow (Aug. 12) at 2:00 with the adorable and talented Jennifer Lynn Barnes.

Here are the reasons you should come to our signing:

--Jennifer not only writes well, but she also writes fast, which means I'm prone to hate her, and I may very well go into a Summer Roberts Rage Blackout, circa OC-Season-1 (except it would be a jealousy blackout). And that would be terrible. And funny. And you wouldn't want to miss it.

--There is a very good possiblity that many crazy members of my crazy family will be there and you will understand Cheating at Solitaire sooooo much better once you've seen my mother try to feed total strangers.

--I don't have any idea what I'm going to wear since they probably won't let me wear my usual work clothes (pajamas) to the signing. Or will they? See, you gotta see that for yourself!

--I may decide to look all scholarly and wear my cool new glasses. Except they're for up-close. And they hurt my eyes when I try to focus far away. But I think they make my face look skinnier so I may try it anyway.

So if you see a squinting girl with a skinny face wearing pajamas and trying to attack Jen Barnes because she's so darn prolific, well then, come say hi.


-Ally

Random reader quotes

Random Reader Quote of the Day:

This book was made out of awesome sauce!!!!
by Alex, posted on BarnesandNoble.com

I still don't have much time for proper blogging, but I did want to introduce something new I'm going to be trying for a while.

See, you guys are soooo cool and you've written me such nice emails that I just want to share a little of what you--the critics who matter most--have had to say.

So, for at least the next few weeks I'll be sharing reviews at random.

Thanks again for writing!

Ally

Why you really should pay attention in math class

(even if you want to be a writer)

Some people are “numbers” people—I know. I’m even related to a few (hi Rick!) Other people are “word” people—I know. I am one (hi me!)

Now some would say that if you’re a “word” person and you want to grow up to have a very “wordrific” job that you will never use stuff like algebra again. Not so!

You know how I know? (Besides the fact that I have a mathish day job…) Because today I took the time to build a Microsoft Excel spreadsheet that calculates exactly how many books I have to sell in order to make money for my publishers (a lot!)

And you know how I was able to do this? By calling on what Mrs. Cowan taught me in Algebra I (thanks, Mrs. Cowan!)

So there. Even professional word people can use math sometimes—to count the money they may or may not be earning with their words.

So study hard word people, X could very well equal something fun someday!

Ally

Thumb for rent

You know what one of my favorite TV shows is?

And no, I’m not talking about Veronica Mars (although anyone who would buy a bright yellow vacuum cleaner just because it reminds her of Logan Echols’s car probably does need some sort of professional help.)

No, there’s a show that I’ve loved for far longer: Siskel and Ebert.

I mourned the passing of Gene Siskel several years ago and welcomed Richard Roeper into the fold with skeptically open arms as the show became Ebert and Roeper.

And now Roger Ebert is recovering from cancer surgery and they’re reaching out to guest hosts.

This. Is. My. Chance.

Pick me! Pick me!

I would be awesome at this job! (I’d even get a manicure to ensure that I had the prettiest thumbs in movie reviewing history!)

Jay Leno was on last week and I was pleasantly surprised with how he did. In fact, he articulated something I’ve been thinking for a long time.

When reviewing my new favorite movie I haven’t seen, Little Miss Sunshine, he said that it was a superb case of a movie where money could have ruined the funny.

Brilliant!

If you don’t quite get what he meant, let’s use Richard Roeper’s follow-up example to that point. Earlier this year we had RV, a big studio movie with a major star, Robin Williams. It was one gag after another with the RV going into lakes and things exploding.

Little Miss Sunshine has (essentially) the same plot—dysfunctional family going on roadtrip. But it doesn’t have the money to do those big gags. It has to be smart instead.

I’ve said before that I thought the second Pirates of the Caribbean movie lagged behind the first. You know why? The money ruined the funny.

The POTC writers have written on their site, wordplay, about all the things they initially wanted to do in the first movie but the budget didn’t allow for it so they had to rethink and get creative—like the villains only looking skeletal in the moonlight—that was all because of the budget.

So one point I’m trying to make is that restrictions on creativity can be a good thing. A very good thing.

And also, even though I said I’m no longer taking on consulting work, I’d totally make an exception for you, Ebert and Roeper! My thumb is all yours!

(But I’m keeping my awesome yellow vacuum!)

Have it your way!

Okay, I'm sooooo busy that I don't have time for a proper blog, so instead I'll just share a little observation I made over lunch: you can tell a lot about a person by their Subway sandwich.

While standing in the looooong line that I always end up standing in if I don't go before noon or after one, I watched all kinds of people order, and didn't see the same sandwich twice.

Are Subway sandwiches like fingerprints--unique and unduplicatable?

Here's mine (and you know you go to Subway way too much if you order it in the exact same way--verbatim--every time.)

Six inch turkey on wheat. No cheese. Toasted.

What kind of cheese? I'll get asked.

No cheese, I'll say.

Then, after explaining that no, I really don't want cheese, and yes I know it's included in the sandwich price, and no it's not because I'm against cheese, I'm just not willing to give up the Weight Watchers point it would cost me, I move on to the veggie portion of our program:

Lettuce. Tomatoes. Pickles. LOTS of black olives--could I have some more black olives please? Salt and pepper. And... (this is where I deviate when I'm feeling dangerous) ....low fat mayo, OR ranch dressing, (OR if I'm wanting to save another WW point) spicy mustard.

Throw in a Diet Coke and some Baked Lays (cheddar and sour cream flavor) and you've got the Ally Carter Subway combo.

Really, you can order it by name.

So what Subway sandwich are you?


--Ally


ps...I believe this might be the single-lamest diary post ever. Today Meg Cabot's blogging about meeting JK Rowling and I'm blogging about olives and the age-old mayo versus mustard debate. I'll do better soon, I promise.

Funny Lies

I got a case of “the panics” this morning—you know the feeling. (Or maybe you don’t.) But I was just blow-drying my hair and I realized that last year at this time I had three books to finish. Now I’m almost project-less.

What am I going to write next?

It’s a question you can’t dodge. It follows you everywhere. Everyone wants to know.

Do I have ideas? Oodles of them. But soon I will have to decide which—if any—of them are good enough.

This is not an easy thing!

And it’s harder now than ever before because I’ve been to the promised land (a.ka. Hollywood) and I don’t really want to go back.

So that’s my new bar, and boy is it a high one.

There are people who go their whole lives without coming up with one option-worthy idea. Who am I to think I deserve two?

Still, a girl’s gotta try.

So what makes a great romantic comedy, I had to ask, and as always I came up with the same answer: a lie.

When I think of my favorite romantic comedy movies of all time they almost all have a lie at their center.

--Overboard: Rich woman falls off yacht, gets amnesia, and a small-town handyman tells her she’s his wife in order to get money she owes him back via free housekeeping and babysitting.

--Grosse Point Blank: A hit man in the midst of a personal crisis goes to his high school reunion in hopes of rekindling an old flame who thinks he’s joking when he tells her what he does (note: this is the thing I like best about this movie—it’s a lie without a lie! Brilliant!)

--IQ: an ordinary mechanic falls for Albert Einstein’s genius niece and tries to win her heart by pretending (with Albert’s help) to be a genius himself.

--Working Girl: Secretary pretends to be an executive to get ahead in business.

--While You Were Sleeping: a woman without any family pretends to be the fiancé of a man in a comma, but ends up falling for the man’s brother.

That’s just the start of my list.

What about you?

-Ally

edit: Oh my gosh! How could I have forgotten the greatest lie-based romantic comedy ever????

CAN'T BUY ME LOVE! High school nerd (who eventually grows up to be a 'McDreamy' doctor) pays the most popular girl in school to be his girlfriend so that he can become "in" by association. A classic!

People I adore

I'm all about the list-y blogs this week, am I not? But hey, when you're a writer on a deadline you take coherent thought whichever way it comes.

So today I'm telling the world all about the people I A-D-O-R-E.

My editors, Kate and Donna. Most writers can go their whole lives without having one editor as cool and talented and just generally spiffy as these two ladies. I'm blessed, blessed, blessed to get to work with them and not a day passes that I don't wish they lived nearby so that they could come over and watch Veronica Mars with me.

Speaking of which, I've got to include Veronica Mars--the character (yes,fictional peope are allowed! It's my list!) And heck I might as well throw in the writers and creative powers-that-be over on TV's most underrated show.

My agent, Kristin Nelson, who would go to the mat for me at any time but who also kicks me in my substantial butt when I need it.

Megan Shull who is not only the author of one of my favorite books in a long time, AMAZING GRACE, but she is also the very cool person who sent me a goodie bag. How can I not adore her? (Go buy her book!)

Sarah Dessen who is the queen bee of the literary-yet-readable YA heap right now and doesn't even seem to know that she could be a snob if she wanted to--like the really pretty girl in school who was nice to everyone even when she didn't have to be. Yeah, that's like Sarah Dessen. And she's a Veronica Mars fan who is doing her best to spread the word to the masses--go Sarah!

Jana DeLeon who is another Nelson Agency writer. Not only is Jana hysterical, but she's also kind. In fact, when I was in rewrite purgatory with Learning to Play Gin Jana was kind enough to read it and give me the "what are you complaining about--it's fine--now finish the darn thing" kick in the pants we all need sometimes (except she did it nicer. And funnier.)

My hairdresser Woody who gives me tons of material I haven't quite managed to use yet, like when he was shampooing my hair last month and said, "This is sudsing up so much it's like I'm making Cool Whip!"

Tim "make it work" Gunn from Project Runway. Where is the literary Tim Gunn, I beg of you? Where?!?

Steve Carell who, thanks to his performance in this trailer for Little Miss Sunshine, is now the only person I can ever see playing Mr. Mosckowitz in the Love You Kill You movie.

My niece who says things like "U aut um oclate aith?" which I evetually interpret as "Do you want some chocolate, Faith," to which she replies, "Okay!" as if it was entirely my idea and then I have no choice but to give her chocolate. (Hey, you gotta reward them for being smart, right?)

And finally I adore all the people who have bought the books lately. You guys rock! I think you must be not only buying books but also telling your friends to buy books because...well...I can't say, but just know that I adore you most of all!

Now, I gotta write more books...

-Ally





Remember: Signing August 12th, 2:00, Barnes and Noble on 41st street in Tulsa with another person I adore, Jennifer Lynn Barnes.

Questions for the universe?

Why does it have to be so hot and dry that people who lived through the Dust Bowl are complaining about it?

Why does Angela on Project Runway seem to be trying to single-handedly bring back the bubble skirt?

(And on a related note) Does anyone really miss the bubble skirt? Did anyone look good in them?

Why do I always say I don't want to go to conferences until the conferences are going on and then I drool with jealousy?

How is it possible I didn't know about the JK Rowling thing until the week of it--probably months after it was possible to get tickets?

Why are purses so ugly now?

How am I going to survive until new Veronica Mars episodes start in November?

Will Wentworth Miller still be hot now that he's going to be out of jail and on the run on Prison Break?

Is it possible for the Oklahoma State University football team to have a year worse than last year?

What am I going to wear to my signing on August 12th at 2:00 at the Barnes and Noble on 41st Street in Tulsa so that I don't look too fat when standing next to the uber-adorable Jennifer Lynn Barnes?

Why does Google keep sending people who want to know about tomato diseases to this site?

Will I ever be as cool as Sarah Dessen and Meg Cabot?

Why am I not working right now?


--Ally

Things I've been meaning to say

Thank You! To everyone who has written emails, or MySpace comments or Amazon or BN.com reviews about how much you’ve liked the book. You guys rock!

Diana Peterfreund was totally right when she said Working Girl was a great example of chick lit. In fact, I can think of a lot of pre-Bridget chick lit movies, Baby Boom, Funny Face, Sabrina, Private Benjamin, Moonstruck… The list could go on and on.

Unlike a lot of TV shows, I think Veronica Mars will actually be better in a college setting. (And if there are any people out there who haven’t given Veronica Mars a try yet, then…well…I’m washing my hands of you.)

It’s way freaking hot.

I wrote a scene today for GG2 that I love. Like L-O-V-E love.

My dream job would be a television critic so that I can go to all the Pilot showcases.

Speaking of pilots, the thought of Bradley Whitworth and Matthew Perry on a show together is almost too much for me. Seriously. I need medication.

And finally, I need to go fix my makeup because I’ve been crying all afternoon. That’s right. Actual tears. My mascara is all clumpy and getting in my eye because I made the mistake of watching this trailer for Little Miss Sunshine and then I laughed so hard I couldn’t laugh anymore and I was doing this noiseless-convulsing-crying thing. It wasn’t pretty. But it was pretty darn funny.

(And it will be even funnier if you know and/or are related to my friend Amanda, to whom that last thing actually happened. Twice.)

Well, back to work!

Ally

Wanna get rich?

I should start by saying that I’ve been wanting to blog about this topic for a while now, and I just realized that it probably makes a pretty good follow-up to yesterday’s freak out about my three jobs.

So…let’s talk money!

We all know that writers have to be good with words, but it doesn’t hurt to be good with money, too, because there’s no such thing as a regular paycheck when you write fiction.

Authors earn money via royalties. Some of the money comes in the form of an “Advance against royalties”, or advance for short.

You will know what your advance will be when you sell your book. Some advances are for millions of dollars, but usually advances are between five and twenty thousand. (Some even lower.)

This is money that your publisher pays you (usually spread out over time). It’s your money (excepting what you pay your agent and the IRS). No matter how the book sells you won’t have to give this money back.

But if the book doesn’t “earn out” the advance then you won’t get any more money.

Let’s do an example:

You write a very cool book and get a very cool agent who sells it to a very cool editor who wants to publish it in paperback and build your career slowly. That’s very cool—a lot of megabestsellers have started out that way.

They offer you a $10,000 advance and promise to pay you royalties in the amount of $1 per book for every book they sell.

(Note: these numbers were chosen purely for the purpose of easy math, not publishing statistics!)

So that means that your publisher will pay you $10,000, usually in two or three payments.

The first thing you do is pay your agent (usually 15%). Then set some aside for the IRS (this is uber-important!!!!)

This is all the money you will get unless you “earn out”, or sold 10,000 books. If you sell 10,002 then your publisher should owe you two additional dollars.

Make sense?

But here’s the kicker: you may never sell another book.

Your first book may not earn out and the publisher might not want to publish you again. Or the genre as a whole might be in a slump (think chick lit recently). Or maybe you just don’t have anymore really great ideas. All these things happen all the time.

So when people ask me why I haven’t quit my dayjob, that’s the answer I have to give—I’m afraid. Period.

Also, I’m well aware of a little principle called the Time Value of Money.

For my dayjob (and this can be a nice clue to all of you playing the “guess what Ally’s dayjob is” game over on MySpace), I work with money, and let me tell you, time is a huge factor in growing wealth.

What’s worth more to you a dollar today or a dollar tomorrow? Today, right?

You might need to buy something on the way home from school… Your friend who owes you the buck could get hit by a bus tomorrow morning and never pay you… Or, my favorite, you could put that dollar in the bank and have it drawing interest.

Compounding interest is a wonderful, wonderful thing!

By saving my book money when I’m still pretty young, that money just sits in savings, drawing interest. And then because I still have my dayjob, I don’t touch it, so I’m drawing interest on the interest. Then interest on the interest on the interest.

Oooh. It’s so fun! All kinds of money—multiplying! And the longer it sits there the more it grows!

When people hear that I optioned a book to Disney they have a hard time believing that I drive a car that has 80,000 miles on it. I’m currently wearing shoes that I’ve had for five or six summers (and have just started to fall apart, darn it!) And I still have a dayjob (but just one, now, because I’m standing firm on my no-more-consulting vow!)

But I still have my book money.

And it’s reproducing!

Some people make a lot of money writing books. Some people make a lot of money playing baseball, too, but that doesn’t mean it’s something everyone can do.

The easiest way to make money is to take care of the money you earn.

--Spend it on things that will last (like shoes that will last five or six years instead of ones that will fall apart by the end of the summer).

--Set aside money for savings before you go shopping and vow to just save whatever’s leftover.

--And, most importantly, start saving early. Let your money work for you!

Through preaching now—I promise!

Ally

PS…I’m writing this for all you teens because, sadly, a lot of grownups learn this lesson waaaaay too late!